We have a five-year-old... ...human... staying with us this week. What a truly awful child. I have never seen anything like it in my life. And I've seen horrible kids before.
We have a ten and twelve-year-old. I'm far from being a perfect dad and I was far from being a perfect child. I worry about my kids. I try to encourage them with sport and homework, learning and thinking and having fun. I can see where my parents got it right and wrong and I try to take their good points and adjust and adapt my own methods to bring up and prepare my kids for the 21st century. But I just can't seem to get it right. Sometimes I'm not spending enough time with them, sometimes I'm in the wrong when I discipline them, sometimes I just screw up. I worry I'm not the dad I should be. I just worry, full stop.
But this week, we have guests, mother and daughter. It started as bemusement which quickly became shock at what I've been seeing. "It's mine. You can't have any. I want it." That's all it says. None stop. Like pulling a string on the back of a doll. Quite simply, the five-year-old rules the roost and it stomps, screams and throws vile insults until the mother comes out with the usual half-hearted "yes darling, we'll go and buy one".
A couple of days ago I had to get involve and apply some serious discipline. It was determined to drop lego in my fish tank. I said "No". It tried again and I shouted "NO! Stay away from my fish!". It started again with the tantrums, and the mother said to me "surely it would be ok to just drop in a small piece". My reply started with "fudge off". Or thereabouts.
Anyway, the (very-wealthy-wife-of-a-banker) woman has been out all day - spa, hairdressers, make-up, botox etc and we've been looking after 'it'. This week's experience has given me a different perspective. Perhaps I am getting it right after all. There's never been any 'mine' in this house, only sharing. No tantrums, just arguments, debates and a resolution - yes or no and that's final. Go off, lark around, ride your bike or play on your laptop but first, homework. They're both doing well at school, they're both stable and well-balanced, she has dance lessons, he has tennis lessons. They do fight like cat and dog sometimes but they play and laugh and work together. Maybe I shouldn't worry quite so much as I do. Chill out dad.
You know, I tried to show it how to draw flowers this afternoon and it couldn't hold a pencil. It wouldn't put the iPad down.
I must go downstairs now and join the racket. Any experience with any horrible little rotters?
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