The house opposite me was sold about a year ago after the sad demise of its lovely elderly owner. The new inhabitants are middle class professionals with a young family, who are well off enough to have purchased a 500k house whilst not selling their former home - they rent it out in the private sector. They are charming, well spoken people, and are for the most part good neighbours - i.e. our children often play with theirs, they occasionally look after ours for a few hours when necessary and vice versa.
However. They are hoarders, and keep their house in a terrible condition inside, every room of their substantial home is an utter bombsite, with piles of junk flowing everywhere, under a layer of permanent dust. It's a bit musty in there as a result, not very nice.
This behaviour has now started encroaching on the front garden, now that the house and sizable double garage can take no more. The front room of our house overlooks this sight directly, and it has become a permanent eyesore. Today, it appears that they have begun replacing a bathroom suite and old sanitary ware has appeared in the pile. I have no reason to suspect that it will be gone quickly, judging by the rest of the rubbish piled there. They leave half empty compost bags scattered around the garden also.
I'm pretty fed up with it, Mrs A is starting to get hysterical and talking about moving (I know she doesn't mean it, Mediterranean histrionics being what they are), and I'd like to address the problem. Also, my next door neighbour on my side of the close is an elderly lady who is about to market her house, and I don't want her to be stymied by having neighbours opposite who would look to potential buyers like a potential problem family.
Any suggestions for tactics to get them to sort this out, without upsetting the apple cart? I'm wanting to just go over there and be straight about it, but I have a somewhat unintentionally confrontational manner sometimes and I don't want to start a war over it. Any ideas?
Last edited by: Alanović on Wed 23 Jan 13 at 16:14
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>> over it. Any ideas?
Just a warning, you are aware you have to disclose any disputes with neighbours when selling up?
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Very true. That's why I don't want to turn it in to a dispute. Want to keep it real friendly like, but not sure I can carry that off and could do with some advice from any cooler heads out there who might be able to suggest a way to approach it.
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Drop a reasonably subtle hint - put a few black bags in the car while the neighbour's about, mention you're going to the tip,and would they like you to take some of the stuff from the garden while you're at it.
There is a risk of course that you could end up acting as their mini skip service.......
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>> Very true. That's why I don't want to turn it in to a dispute. Want
>> to keep it real friendly like, but not sure I can carry that off and
>> could do with some advice from any cooler heads out there who might be able
>> to suggest a way to approach it.
>>
I think you have your answer from Pat. By definition anyone who doesn't care what their front garden look like won't actually care if someone offers to clear it up as long as you don't come across as being personally critical.
It's a a strange thing but some people just don't seem to notice large amounts of litter and rubbish around them. Personally I couldn't live like that but I know people who genuinely don't seem bothered or somehow don't actually notice .
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>>I have a somewhat unintentionally confrontational manner sometimes <<
Now there's an understatement:)
Right, here's how I would deal with it.
A white lie is in order at times, so I would play on the fact your other neighbour is about to market her house and needs to show a nice tidy neighbourhood to attract a good price.
Don't mention the inside...not at any cost as an Englishmans home is his castle!
Then I would offer your help to him to tidy up the outside and arrange to get it all removed to the tip.
You can do this tactfully Alanovic, and it probably hasn't even occured to them how it looks to others.
Pat
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Confronting untidy neighbours
You have not started in the right way with this as the subject title!
If you have a neighbour who is attempting to sell, use her as your proxy. It would be in her interests to even pay to have it tidied up.
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That might be worth a try, Pat. Ta.
No intention of mentioning the inside, that's their business, but the other annoying thing they do - they have pendant lights in the front rooms of the house, but no lampshades, and they don't draw the blinds. So from our house the light from the pendants is very distracting and piercing. And you can see the piles of junk in the evenings. So it is tempting to ask them to do something about that, too. It just looks awful. It's such a shame, it's a lovely house and the old girl before them had it from new and treated it like a museum.
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Let them turn the street into a tip, buy up all the houses as they come onto the market at a depressed price, clear up the offending persons front garden for them, and sell your property portfolio at profit.
Just a variation on a well known developers scam.
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Wish I had the resources to buy the house next door, Z.
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Dont the council deal with this sort of thing? Maybe it comes under anti-social behaviour?
I would rather let a council jobsworth confront a neighbour than start a direct conversation as there is no way of knowing how it will go and you could be lumbered with an irritable neighbour who is angry at you rather than the council ( Who are used to it ).
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Council won't be interested - not one of their tenants. Environmental Health might be the best option - the "rat sighting" might be the tipping point - mind you these services are cut to the bone and may no longer be available in your area..
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>>Any ideas?
It isn't that they haven't noticed. Its that they don't care.
I would enlist the help of the elderly neighbour, since if she is a robust type and moving away anyway, she might not mind being Mrs Bad Person.
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Some photos would be fun?
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Act all neighbourly and tell them you have seen a rat - or what looked like one - around the rubbish..
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>> They leave half empty compost bags scattered around the garden also.
Terrible. I think we have three or four of those in our garden. I truly think I would be speechless if somebody came and asked me to remove them. Though I draw the line at sanitary ware.
As my wife (currently at at the V&A Hollywood costumes exhibition instead of attending to the hoovering and ironing) is wont to observe, a tidy house is a sign of a wasted life!
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>> As my wife (currently at at the V&A Hollywood costumes exhibition instead of attending to
>> the hoovering and ironing) is wont to observe, a tidy house is a sign of
>> a wasted life
I have obviously lived a full and satisfying one:-)
What does a tidy garage say?
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>> What does a tidy garage say?
>>
O.C.D.?
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We have a untidy neighbour our back fence is shared.Very nice couple do any problems and they are the first to help out.I joked once to the chap about tidying up and he admitted that he should.Live and let live it is easy to make enemies.
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>> We have a untidy neighbour our back fence is shared.Very nice couple do any problems
>> and they are the first to help out.I joked once to the chap about tidying
>> up and he admitted that he should.Live and let live it is easy to make
>> enemies.
>>
I would agree about inside and the back of the house, but when its the front and its affecting the whole road then something needs to change.
Think I would try offering help - i.e. do you need a hand to load that into your car when you take it to the tip!
Perhaps if your council will collect such stuff you could "mention" it to him under the guise of "they will collect that if you give them a call - save you taking it to the tip"
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>>
>> >> What does a tidy garage say?
>> >>
>>
>> O.C.D.?
>>
FIL bought a house a few years back on a new development. It was the showhome and the double garage was being used as the sales center.
They were going to return the garage to its original condition, but he stopped them, so in the end they just removed the patio doors from the front and put the doors on. Inside it was plaster boarded out with nice downlighters and heating. He loved it!
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i know a few people like that, you have to wipe your shoes when you leave the house
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Well I took the Pat route yesterday evening. Went over and spoke to the lady of the house (hisself wasn't there). I explained about my neighbour selling up, and the lady immediately said that she will need to clean up the front. So let's see how it goes. Didn't get nasty about it, seemed mildly contrite if anything. Let's hope once its cleared, it stays cleared. I won't have an old lady to hide behind next time.
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Excellent result. A success for diplomacy over confrontation!
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I'm glad I live a long way from the attention of the House Tidyness Gestapo.
What a cheek! If I choose to have a few dismantled cars and scrap metal and a pile of tyres and lots of stuff that might come in useful one day, that's my business.
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Can I kenel my dogs in the cars in your front garden?
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>> What a cheek! If I choose to have a few dismantled cars and scrap metal
>> and a pile of tyres and lots of stuff that might come in useful one
>> day, that's my business.
Certainly wold be, if it didn't impinge on anyone else's enjoyment of their neighbourhood. If your back garden was filled with crap and I couldn't see it, that's fine.
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>> Let's hope
>> once its cleared, it stays cleared.
I doubt it, unless they have a personality change, or they are worried what other people think. Grow an evergreen hedge in the front so that you can't see it when it happens again.
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I keep my rubbish well hidden : under nettles in the field adjacent :-)
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>> Grow an evergreen hedge in the front so that you can't see it
>> when it happens again.
Good grief no. I like the view my house affords me down the avenue. I wouldn't want to block it off like that and restrict the light coming in also.
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>>>If I choose to have a few dismantled cars and scrap metal and a pile of tyres and lots of stuff that might come in useful one day, that's my business.
This your gaff?
www.flickr.com/photos/54867420@N08/7364557568/in/pool-rusty_old_cars/
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Having made quite a few rail trips over the last few years, it bugs me to see the amount of rubbish people throw over garden fences onto Railtrack property.
From embankments you can see houses whose back gardens are immaculate nestled up to a similar house that looks like a landfill site.
It's understandable for the 'good ' folk to get hacked off with it all.
From someone who has rails at the end of the garden......Grrrr
Ted
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I hate the idea of clandestine complaints to councils etc., an unwelcome import from the American school "honour system". There is even a snitch box in my local library for grassing on people. So, if a friendly word (an essential first step) did not work, I would tend to put up with the nuisance if I wanted to stay on good terms with neighbours, so long as there was no health or other serious threat.
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I always report untaxed cars if I see any.
Thieves forcing up my taxes is my view.
Tolerance of abuse encourages it...
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>>
>> This your gaff?
>>
>> www.flickr.com/photos/54867420@N08/7364557568/in/pool-rusty_old_cars/
>>
No. This is the next door neighbour's place.
Link to DM
tinyurl.com/dxcn8mq
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>> This your gaff?
>>
>> www.flickr.com/photos/54867420@N08/7364557568/in/pool-rusty_old_cars/
>>
Yes, very similar. I've recently had a dismantling/culling session, so I'm down to only two cars now. But I need more rusty sheds to put the stuff in.
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>>>more rusty sheds to put the stuff in.
Having only just left the fen I well recall how someone's new shed was usually reclaimed bitumen painted corrugated on telegraph poles.... or sometimes a wall of old doors.
Here is our fen yard 20yrs ago just after we'd moved in and before the many new buildings and stoned surface. Of course we've outed all that stuff now and live a tidy life.
img163.imageshack.us/img163/204/yardb.jpg
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Well done Alanovic, we'll make a peacemaker out of you yet:)
Pat
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>>>we'll make a peacemaker out of you yet
Well at least until the 3 scrap cars and ton of pig muck arrives that her husband ordered.
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At which point I can lend you a brace of fairly big very "Assertive" dogs.
Last edited by: Zero on Thu 24 Jan 13 at 15:28
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Report them to the Enviromental Health & tell them you saw rats and foxes in the large amount of filth in the front garden and are afraid for the Children living in the street.
They will turn up and sort it out.
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Report them anonymously, in which case they will probably suss out who the informant is, or openly and the result will be the same: a sharp increase in neighbourly discord.
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I arrived home yesterday to find the offending material absent. All gone in a day.
Case closed.
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Good:)
Now I'm off to sort out the wusses on the blood donating thread;)
Pat
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I wonder what comrade Alanović would have to say about this: goo.gl/maps/W0xuB
^_^
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If I lived opposite that, I'd be more worried about needing the iron bars on the ground floor windows.....
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Confronting untidy neighbours - Zero
