Euphemisms.
Passed away. Passed over. Why bother? Someone's died? Well they're dead, aren't they? They haven't passed over, they've died.
RIP. What's that about? Who is it for? The dead person, well, they won't read it, they are dead. The living? Well, it doesn't apply to us - does it?
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I hate that sugar-coating crap. My sister passed (from the hallway to the bathroom then promptly dropped dead from a brain clot).
Equally nauseated by that 'R.i.P.' and references to god, god bless, heaven, prayers, angels, salt of the earth, sending thoughts, and worst of all, 'sorely missed'. You won't be. I have all the albums.
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I take it that you're not a fan of the grime covered plastic flowers attached to street furniture either then BBD?
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'grime covered plastic flowers attached to street furniture'
Yeah, often reserved for the local 'salt of the earth' reprobate killed doing something he should've been doing. And all the pilgrims coming to pay respect (to take selfies for social media). 'He would do anything for anyone'. Clearly.
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Oh Death rant time - Good Oh.
What gets my goat is birthdays. "If he had lived he would have been 80 today" He didn't so he wouldn't, why did you say that, where does it stop? "If he had lived he would have been 175"?
Remember a deceased love ones birthday by all means. "Today was xxxxx's birthday". Raise a glass maybe, think of a memory, but not "had they lived"
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Had he live Shizong of Jin, Chinese Emperor and the 5th Emperor of the Jurchen-led Jin dynasty would have been 900 today.
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Excellent, I shall raise a glass today for old Uncle Shizong.
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Howls about JC, he must be at least 2023 years old by now.
Two thousand years and he ain't shown yet, we kept his seat warm and the table set.
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>> Howls about JC, he must be at least 2023 years old by now.
Some folk reckon 2022 as they wouldn't have started counting from zero ;>)
See also, The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe.
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>>See also, The Restaurant At The End Of The Universe.
I always thought Deep Purple made the loudest sound in the universe.
:o)
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>> Howls about JC, he must be at least 2023 years old by now.
>>
>> Two thousand years and he ain't shown yet, we kept his seat warm and the
>> table set.
>>
I think you missed out on the news of his resurrection
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>> >> Howls about JC, he must be at least 2023 years old by now.
>> >>
>> >> Two thousand years and he ain't shown yet, we kept his seat warm and
>> the
>> >> table set.
>> >>
>>
>> I think you missed out on the news of his resurrection
BBD will fill you in on his second coming.
Err, oh dear, that didnt sound right either
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....I thought the Labour party had decreed he wouldn't be resurrected, so keeping his seat warm would be a waste of time....
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>> Passed away. Passed over. Why bother? Someone's died? Well they're dead, aren't they?
In my youth Passed Away was the language of my grandparent's generation. I remember answering the phone at home aged around 16-17 to one of my paternal grandmother's sisters who would have been in her seventies. She told me that Uncle Billy, the husband of another of her siblings had passed away in the night.
By the time my own Father died in 1996 we used the term died, although Passed Away slipped out with one branch of the family for whom the CofE was the family business.
Since then it seems to have made a come back, mutliple people refer to X, Y or Z as having Passed Away/On, or even more gratingly Passed.
My children have been told I will die and if they use any other language I will return and haunt them!!
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Not the responses I was expecting.
And another thing. At my funeral, I don't want any cobblers about "he has not gone, he is in the next room". No men in long frocks. No hymns, except Jerusalem, because that's rugby, innit?
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In the K9 world, dead doggies "pass over rainbow bridge" sometimes become "another bright star in the sky", or wait for our arrival to join them. When my older Goldie dies, and there is any form of afterlife, she will be manipulating anyone she can find, not waiting for me.
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And another thing. At my funeral, I don't want any cobblers about "he has not gone, he is in the next room". No men in long frocks. No hymns, except Jerusalem, because that's rugby, innit?
But why do you care what they say or what happens at your funeral? You will be dead.
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>> But why do you care what they say or what happens at your funeral? You
>> will be dead.
I don't doubt that as usual, I will be paying for it.
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...well, the round at 'spoons anyway...
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>> ...well, the round at 'spoons anyway...
You ever had a spoons funeral sarnie platter?
Revenge - a dish best served cold.
Last edited by: Zero on Wed 29 Mar 23 at 11:51
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>>
>> You ever had a spoons funeral sarnie platter?
>>
....I think I've passed on that!....
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> I don't doubt that as usual, I will be paying for it.
>>
If you're dead, you've no money anyway.
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>> I don't doubt that as usual, I will be paying for it.
How will you be managing that then? Some form of paypal from the other side?
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>> And another thing. At my funeral, I don't want any cobblers about "he has not
>> gone, he is in the next room". No men in long frocks. No hymns, except
>> Jerusalem, because that's rugby, innit?
I shall look forward to it.
"Hmmm not sure that came out right"
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....you going to wear your long frock at the service, Z, just to annoy him...?
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>> ....you going to wear your long frock at the service, Z, just to annoy him...?
Well my little black number wouldn't look right at a funeral now, would it. Could wear a nuns habit maybe? they come in grey.
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....you'll just have to hope BBD won't be attending.... :-O
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>> ....you'll just have to hope BBD won't be attending.... :-O
b***** me! Not that I'll care at that point.
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The expression I hate is 'Happy heavenly birthday'...
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The funniest thing ever on Facebook in its early days "she's with the angles" - spot the mistake
Tell it as it is in my world.
Some one posted on our city page "I'm sorry to say that a cat has passed away by the garage" ffs. It's dead, squashed by a massive truck
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Iused to read the deaths in the Manchester Evening News, often seeing a name I knew. I read one that said " May the Holy light from Blessed Jesus s***e upon his soul "
I bet they got their money back.
I've asked for a humanist do when I pass the finishing post, my mother had one. I've asked for Flanders & Swann's "The Slow Train" as it mentions my station from where we caught the hiker's specials in the 60s, with any one of Rickard Strauss " Four Last Songs " to go out with.
My Uncle Walter, the last of the previous generation went in to " Walter, lead me to the altar " and " Sing As We Go " through the curtains . Both Gracie Fields.
I've always liked this from Tennyson.....
There sits the shadow feared by man
who broke our fair companionship
abd spread his mantle dark and cold
and wrapt thee formless in the fold
and dulled the murmur on thy lip,
and bore thee where I could not see,
nor follow, though I walk in haste
and know that somewhere in the waste,
the shadow sits and waits for me.
Can't beat a bit of morbid to cheer you up !
Ted
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Can't beat a bit of morbid to cheer you up !
This is an inscription near the entrance to St Just in Roseland churchyard in godforsaken Cornwall:
Here rest the sleeping dead, and too I.
When yonder dial strikes the hour, must we.
Look around in orderly array - see how the buried hosts await the judgement day.
Stranger in peace pursue thine onward road, but never forget thy last and long abode.
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Perro, St Just has a celebrity in the graveyard who died a long time ago.
Look up C.J.Bowen-Cooke. Zero will know the name.
Ted
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Proper job, Ted.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charles_Bowen_Cooke
Died (passed) age 61 :(
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>> Look up C.J.Bowen-Cooke. Zero will know the name.
Hmmm in Railway history, not one of the greats, certainly not of
Sir Nigel Gresley
Edward Thompson
Arthur H. Peppercorn
Oliver Bulleid
Richard Maunsell
Robert A. Riddles
Sir William Stanier FRS
Charles Collett
class or fame.
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I would add Sir John Audley Frederick Aspinall to the list. A lot of men who became CMEs were trained under him, I have a photo of Gresley in a straw boater stood in front of one of Aspinall's Highflyers at Manchester Victoria before he went to the GNR..
Ted
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>>The expression I hate is 'Happy heavenly birthday'...
Are you out in Los Cris, retpocileh? 30 degrees today!!
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At home in Sussex at the moment Perro, normally spend November in Los Cris, with maybe the odd couple of weeks there at other times of the year as flights and time available . It was nice to be out there during all the second lockdown.
Looking forward to holidays in Northumberland in May and Lake Garda in June , all booked up. and will maybe see if we can fit in a couple of weeks in Crete in September.
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>>At home in Sussex at the moment Perro
One of the best periods of my life was when I spent 3 months (Jan - April) in Los Cris ... on my own :)
Beautiful climate, why go anywhere else in winter. I looked at the price of property in Horizonte, where we lived for 3 years = €290k for a one bed!!!
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>>Lake Garda in June
Will also be there for a few days in June. Driving there, and back if spared.
We stayed at Assenza last time in a hotel with a manager inspired by Basil Fawlty. This year, Manerba del Garda.
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"RIP. What's that about? Who is it for? The dead person, well, they won't read it, they are dead. The living? Well, it doesn't apply to us - does it?"
Just a tad unfair. The original R.I.P. is Latin - Requiescat In Pace, which means "may (s)he rest in peace". So it's a general wish for a restful state for the deceased.
Its validity rests (!) on the assumption that (a) there is some kind of afterlife and (b) that there is someone (a deity, presumably) who can do something about a deceased person's onward existence.
I don't believe in either. My preference for disposing of my remains after death is the cheapest option available. I don't mind what, if any, occasion there may be afterwards, but I do realise that funerals are for the living, not the dead. I may leave some requests, but only because I know that my kids will appreciate some kind of guidance as to what to do - and they will want to do something.
Like others here, I despise the mawkish sentimentality that often seems to surround the end of life.
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"God called him".
What exactly did God want with him, he had a wife and kids down here?
Myself and Mrs O'Reliant are having one of those cheapo funerals, no mourners or anything and definitely no religion. We have each agreed not to tell any family till after the cremation.
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" We have each agreed not to tell any family till after the cremation."
I'm like minded but OTOH I also believe funerals have a place, simply in allowing the living to pay their respects to the dead, and more so to their family.
I also dislike those speeches people give at funerals where there is really nothing much to say. My sis wanted to do one for each of my parents so I let her get on with it but took no part. SWMBO was a bit upset when at her brother's funeral his (adult) daughter gave one but didn't ask for any input on his earlier life, or any of his life with her and their parents. nor was she invited to say anything. Yet there was never any disharmony between them.
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>> SWMBO was a bit upset
>> when at her brother's funeral his (adult) daughter gave one but didn't ask for any
>> input on his earlier life, or any of his life with her and their parents.
>> nor was she invited to say anything. Yet there was never any disharmony between them.
Similar about ten years ago when an aunt by marriage died. By that time she was married to her second husband having been widowed in her mid forties c1983 when husband #1, Mum's brother Sidney, died.
Although they were only married for 11 years he'd led her a merry dance over the previous 12. She was certainly at my sister's christening in 1962 and possibly mine too. Very much part of my our family for as far back as I can remember.
As originally planned there was very little about her life with Sidney and where there was his name was spelled wrongly. My Sis, who was closer to both of them then I was as an adult, asked to be allowed to speak and did her bit about time in her teens when they were second parents to her.
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We have each agreed not to tell any family till after
>> the cremation.
>>
I'd be surprised if they don't find out after you've gone but before the cremation.
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>>
>> >>
>>
>> I'd be surprised if they don't find out after you've gone but before the cremation.
>>
>>
The only family who live in word of mouth distance are those one of Mrs O'Reliant's sisters. We can't stand the sight of them and haven't even spoken for twenty years. The old evil whatsit has dementia anyway and probably wouldn't know she had sisters.
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Fair enough, I've family in the funeral business and quite often there's all manner of secret/surprise plans for their funeral. Rarely ends well.
Last edited by: sooty123 on Wed 29 Mar 23 at 14:58
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I’ve told my lot just to leave me out with the bins when I die. Someone will take me away, particularly if it’s warm weather at the time.
I certainly don’t want anyone I haven’t seen in decades standing around pretending they gave a flying (whatever)
;-)
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>> I certainly don’t want anyone I haven’t seen in decades standing around pretending they gave
>> a flying (whatever)
>> ;-)
Yes, but what about us? We want a decent wake with a free bar, don't we?
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When was the last time you got anything free from a Scotsman, even a dead one?
Oh wait, we did give you a bit of a something for nothing in the Six Nations…
;-)
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>> I’ve told my lot just to leave me out with the bins when I die.
>>
....there won't be any bins on the black runs, best just shuffle you off into the undergrowth...
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Yeah, it’ll either be there or they’ll just find me rotting into the seat in a motorway services somewhere!
;-)
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A few years ago the husband died first closely followed by his wife - they had 3 children.
One of the relations came over and said
"What do you think I should do?"
It turns out that the 3 kids have/had an older half brother that they knew nothing about!.
Before their mum & dad were married he spent time in Wales doing his National Service and had a girlfriend - the child, will now be 60s!
My wife and I immediately said to forget everything about the older half brother.
The discussion lasted about 10 minutes - the couple then agreed that it would not be in anyone's benefit and would cause further grief at a time when they were already trying to cope with their mother's death.
Why, even if they knew of the issue, would they want to bring a skeleton out of the cupboard?
Nothing has surfaced since - thank goodness
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We went to the funeral of an old work colleague on Monday. A beautiful day weather wise. We haven't seen him for quite some time. Never realised he was an active member of the Baptist church.
The last few funerals I have have been to werelow key, un religeous, delivered by a Celebrant and no hymns.
This one was fully loaded and his Baptist friends, and the piped music, delivered the hymns with gusto. Singing tends to be very flat at funerals.
The wake was held at an extended family members old farm house on the north side of Lincoln. A rather large stone impressive pad if I may say so with lovely AnB cottages adjacent to the main building. Apparently he spent some time during his illness staying at the cottage.
But I digress slightly. The place was situated just to the south of RAF Scampton and although they have relocated we were treated to a fabulous practice display by the Red Arrows right above us.
Now that takes some beating :)
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Two recent funerals of friends -
The first was delivered by a celebrant with both the service and the wake at a brewery. The coffin was paraded indoors through the visitors, before being removed to a crematorium, for family only. Although actually held in the area normally used for weddings, it did allow for a seamless transition from service to wake. Actually a well organised and well attended event by a good cross section of friends.
The second, was planned for a morning at a crematorium and we had planned to attend. However the evening before I received a text indicating that 600 people were expected and only 200 could be seated indoors, but with screens outside. I anticipated that it would be more of an exercise in crowd management and with a poor weather forecast chose not to go. Probably the correct decision based on reports that the wake was attended by a similar number, very crowded, and packed in, with an average age of over 70 and not a mask in sight.
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Just got back from a funeral today of my partners cousins husband, a very well known and respected motorcycle dealer and racer.
Coffin was carried on a sidecar and some 60 bikes accompanied it into the crematorium. Fabulous noise and smell of oil.
No religion, just a celebrant and standing room only. The most poignant moment was when the crematorium was filled with the noise of a motorcycle starting up, setting off and fading into the distance as the funeral came to an end.
Wake was graced by beautiful old Velocette, Matchless and BMW bikes inside the hall.
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A mask? I live in central London and masks are as common as they were before 2020.
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Fully 20% of the peeps I know who went to crufts, contracted covid - or suspected so -. No-one wore a mask, I think its accepted now that its a hazard of life, and unless clinically vulnerable, take few precautions.
I dont wear a mask in close crowd proximity situations. However, I will on my flight in May.
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We've had COVID twice. The second time was worse than the first. I'm not looking forward to the next time.
Apparently this not not uncommon. Something to do with the fact that the immune response can be part of the problem.
www.scientificamerican.com/article/do-repeat-covid-infections-increase-the-risk-of-severe-disease-or-long-covid/
Last edited by: Manatee on Fri 31 Mar 23 at 15:12
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>> I dont wear a mask in close crowd proximity situations. However, I will on my
>> flight in May.
No, it's ok, you'll be alright.
Trust me.
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What others are in use?
Shuffle(d) off this mortal coil.
Croaked.
Fell off their perch
and later in the processes - pushing up daisies
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Snuffed it
Brown bread
Departed (not late probably :-) )
Gone to be with the angels
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'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!
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Visiting friends, I noticed the budgie was quiet. Has he fallen off his perch, I asked?
Laying in the bottom of its cage. They did forgive me, eventually.
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I like "Oh, it's just handbags", when a couple of rugby players are trying to kill each other.
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>> Snuffed it
Carked it. Where did that one come from?
and Kicked the bucket?
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Sudden death notification.
"Are you the widow Smith?" :/
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>> Sudden death notification.
>>
>> "Are you the widow Smith?" :/
or the famous army parade ground one.
Squad! Squad at ease.
All those with Fathers take one step forward.
SMITH! WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING
STAND STILL YOU HORRIBLE LITTLE MAN!
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Euphemisms - BiggerBadderDave
