Mimsing pedestrains that is, pop into the motorway services to have a leak, or the supermarket to grab some bread and milk and there they are.
As soon as you walk through the door which they've minced through in front of you they then stop several abreast.
Jaws dropped in awe as they gaze at the magnificence of the place, as you battle to get past them...they manage to take up more room than a gasometer...you find more of them dawdling towards the gents, they seem to possess an uncanny ability to detect someone behind who actually wants to have a pee and get on with his day before he retires.
They are the same at the supermarket, meandering down the isles picking stuff up and putting it back, double parking the blasted uncontrollable trolley, sideways if possible, causes more congestion that way, they manage to meet some equally boring friends and treble park the things in the narrowest place they can find, if it's a wide isle they stagger the trolleys to create a chicane and then park their huge back sides in the only passing place.
Of course the teenage ones will have the 4 children from hell from 4 different fathers with them running amok screaming like demented apes.
She Who Must has less time for them than i do, her usual mutterings as she shoves their trolleys out the way ('excuse me' doesn't compute, too many syllables) is along the lines of ''imagine it behind a steering wheel''
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And people wonder why we 'ran away' to Sunny Cornwall :)
For a start there is not a single motorway in the whole of Cornwall, so no motorway services,
The supermarkets have been a tad busy (for Cornwall) of late according to swmbo,
but wil quieten down now the emmetts have gorn back over The Tamar,
I may go back to England one day though - in a wooden overcoat!
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Aha! I found a cure to this one... Talk!
Before entering a congested area, pick out your phone, call someone, preferably a colleague and talk shop (which parts crowds wayyy better than "Hi Mum...")
I don't know why it works, but it does. I don't increase my volume, i doubt you could follow my conversation from 6ft away or even hear me more than 10ft away.
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interesting i see more and more people pretending to be on the phone these days to make themselves look important
they look wassaks to me (no offence mr new name)
however
i stopped a person only a few weeks ago pretending to be on the phone at work and buzzed him off only for him to rob a mates wifes handback down the road ,so be careful with your pretend phone calls because i know know its a pretence for burglars liers and cheats............
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It's the ones that come to dead stop the second they step off an escalator trying to work out where they are while the rest of the world has to revolve around them.
They seem to forget that moving walkway is still moving with more people heading their way.
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...on the supermarket theme, the ones who seem astonished to be asked for payment when the cashier has processed their monthly shopping through the till, having had to call someone to check a price and someone else to fetch a forgotten pint of milk who then stand waiting until a final total has been declared before beginning to search for their method of payment. They rummage in the depths of their bag until the wallet is found, produce a card, along with several vouchers collected from previous transactions which give them a free pack of sausages, enter their pin, get a receipt and then decide they have another discount voucher entitling them to a further £1.20 off their £180 bill and ask for the transaction to be re-processed. This is of course refused at which point they ask to speak to the "manager" to protest the injustice of it all....
Last edited by: Humph D'bout on Sun 5 Sep 10 at 22:21
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wassaks too hd-----------
but you forgot to mention cash back------
i couldnt put my basket down on top of the previous one yesterday because it had a half eaten packet of chocolate in it
how come i never see these scum actually eating someones bottom line?
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I remember being in a supermarket queue at a hot counter when Waynetta Slob in front of me ordered a large take away bag of hot cooked chicken nuggets. I noticed her feeding these wondrous things to herself and her offspring as she continued her shopping. Little Chardonnay-Anne and her mother seemed particularly keen on them if not outwardly desperately in need of more calories imminently.
Anyway, later on I found myself behind them at the checkout and of course there was no sign of the presumably by now empty nuggets bag.
Should probably have said something but had reached the stage of just wanting to be anywhere else but there.....
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Speaking as someone who financed college by working at Asda, it's much worse on the other side. People who speak to you like you're a piece of crap. People who open a Multi-pack of crisps to take the flavours they want only to find the individual packs don't go through the EPOS. People who discard weetabix amongst the cornflakes when they've had a change of heart. People who ask you to check in the warehouse but aren't there when you get back. People who just want want to chat cos you're the only human they see all week (I like those people actually). People who are adamant that you've changed the layout of the store to pee them off when it's been the same for three years. The number of clots who drop beetroot jars. I even once had a couple of snotty-nosed teenagers who called me a very rude name and told me to hurry up because they didn't have all day as I helped them with something. I turned to them and opened the blade on my stanley knife (which we all carried to open boxes) and dared them to call me that again.
And worst of all the amount of teachers you meet who say "I told you you'd end up stacking shelves Dave"
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O my gawd...don't get me going on trolley rage !
We have a medium sized branch of a national, used to be Safeway. It was built on our old railway station site many years ago and it's too small.
So they cram a big shop's worth of goods into the narrow aisles of our little one.
Of course, we have all the swanp-donkeys, ditherers and chatterers like all marts.
The woman who will stand for 5 minutes staring at 10.000 identical cans of soup instead of just taking one.
The managers are a great help to this congestion, placing displays on either side of the aisle, just inside at the ends. Shelf stackers now seem to be afraid of the dark, only coming out in the day. There's always a staff trolley just in front of the item you want.
I went in today, I knew what I wanted and I prepared my list in order of where the stuff was.
Only 6 items, and two of them were in the booze section, but it still took me a good half hour.
I got my own back, many years ago at this store.
They extended it to get a couple more aisles in and put in a second entrance with automatic doors.
I called in one wet day and stepped off the rough brick outside onto wet marble effect tiles.
I fell badly, ending up sitting on one of my feet.
I limped in and found the information daesk to warn them of the danger. The obese, disinterested slug of a woman, a supervisor of some sort, laughed at me and said I shouldn't be coming in at that door........with an auto opener on the outside ??
I turned out a manager and insisted he logged the accident, taking his name......I also dobbed the slug in.
I checked later, they put a mat down. I checked a week later, the mat was gone.
My subsequent phone call to the local H & S had the door shut down until some of the tiles were removed and a sunken mat put in. ' Ted's mat ' is there to this day !
Oh, I also had the pleasure of striping them for £1500 plus expenses....could have got more probably but i was tired of the game by then.
Recently, it was found that they had pinched a big chunk of land from railtrack when they bought the site. They've had to give it back so the Metrolink platform can be built.....another major expense for them, redesigning the car park.
Sorry if I put everyones food bills up !
Ted
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>> We have a medium sized branch of a national, used to be Safeway
I remember shopping there in 1990/91 when I lived on Beech Road. It's now a Morrisons and shopped there whilst temporarily living in step-sons house between house sale/purchase. It's not the best is it.
Earlier this year, they had to take a tag off a bottle of champagne in the self service area... and then they dropped it and smashed everywhere.
Noticed they had to sort the car park out - now I know why. The tramline will be running soon I hope.
What I hate about supermarkets in general (especially near Christmas) is people wandering with trollies and not controlling them or just blocking things. I leave mine where there is space and do some walking at times. And M&S with their dine in for ten pounds makes it bedlam in some aisles!
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It's coming on well, Rob. The platforms, ramps and liftshafts are in and the cross wires are in between the traction poles. We have our own ones at the end of the garden !
They've just been cutting through the bridge on St Werburgh's Road to access the lift/steps.
All the track is down and extends to Mauldeth Road West and maybe further......on it's way to Didsbury.
Rumour has it that it's all way ahead of shedule.
Ted
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At East Didsbury they cleared the trees and all stopped afterwards. Not much else happened.
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I'm not surprised this thread was hatched on a Sunday - I studiously avoid supermarkets on Sundays. They're full of all the morons who're unable to sufficiently organise their lives to do their food shopping on any of the other six days of the week. This trait manifests itself in many other areas of their attitude and behaviour, none of which I enjoy witnessing.
Whatever did they do before Sunday opening was legalised?
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I avoid them altogether.
They all do home delivery to my area from £3.50 and I live 9 miles from the nearest one so there really isn't much contest on price.
The real reason though is to avoid the reluctant male trolley pusher.
I'm sure you'll all recognise him!
He's been nagged to go shopping, he'd rather be watching sport on Sky, he didn't want to get up and can only manage by pushing the trolley while leaning on it with his elbows. he wears his teams grubby shirt and trackie bottoms. He mimses around, oblivious to everything and manages to look suitably bored with the whole thing.
When they ban men from supermarkets I just might try using them again:)
Pat
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>>I avoid them altogether.<<
Me too, I avoid dem like the Plague, ain't bin in one for ova 16 years :}
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>> When they ban men from supermarkets I just might try using them again:)
>>
>> Pat
>>
Unfortunately women don't need a licence to drive a shopping trolley, not that it makes much difference to their car driving. :)
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I never did see myself as a trolly dolly GB:)
Pat
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I'd forgotten to mention the ' elbow pushers ' Pat.
I detest them.....a sloppy attitude to trolley etiquette signifies a sloppy attitude to life in general.
I have been known to clip someones ankle with my, correctly propelled, trolley.
Ted
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I'm not keen on the way some of the slob customers pick up an item from the shelf, examine it, and then throw it back in the general direction of whence it came.
Nothing wrong with deciding not to buy something, but why not put it back neatly?
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>> When they ban men from supermarkets I just might try using them again:)
>>
Be fair, Pat. Some of us chaps were trained in the art of supermarket ops when we were young.
I can hear my mother now: "I'm not having you being as useless as your father round this shop. He hasn't got a clue! Now go over there and get me 4 tins of beans. Without dents in them, please."
Yes Mum. Sorry Mum.
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>> .......... they manage to take up more room than a gasometer...
Slight exaggeration, I opine.
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It's not "them", they are the same people as motorists.
I've often observed before, the car has a unique ability to change people's personalities. All pedestrians are mimsers (apart from me), but we all change into average aggresive drivers once behind the wheel.
It's the Toad effect.
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90% of the adult ones are drivers. You are a supermarket user and a driver yourself, as are the others here.
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This thread, and many of the responses, reminds me of the idea that most people have - that they're an above-average driver.
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Not I. I am, however, an above-average supermarket shopper when called upon...
BTW, it's just as bad over here - sometimes you get the impression that people have never seen a hypermarket before and it's all a big exciting adventure, to be shared with everyone around them. And the French invented the darned things!
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imagine them behind the wheel - Dog
