I've been musing on what it is that makes people feel and act their age, and how much the age you feel is a cause rather than a result of one's physical health.
My starting point is the hypothesis that there are three ages of man:
Youth - we don't give a thought to how long we might live. Time moves incredibly slowly. I can remember school stretching on year after year, indefinitely. I can distinctly recall genuinely believing that I would live forever.
Middle - a vast expanse stretching from about 25 up to ten years older than one's current age. One acknowledges the theoretical possibility of death, but only for other people, unless very unlucky.
Old age - about two years before death. Glad it's all over, tedious to have to wait, no fears.
It's often a puzzle to people why youth can be so reckless, with so much to live for, in contrast to older people who have had their experiences.
But that ignores the fact that young people have accumulated no capital. Literal cash, but also no property, no achievements, no real notion of their goals and aspirations. Older people on the other hand have bags of emotional capital and don't want to lose it, so take fewer risks.
Well, off you go. You wanted more threads. Prize of 2/6d for the longest essay, regardless of merit
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I'll have to think about this.
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I really don't recognise the old guy in the mirror, he doesn't look at all like the one in my head. I'm still not sure what I want to do when I grow up.
;-)
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>> Older people on the other hand have bags of emotional capital and don't want to lose it,
>> so take fewer risks.
>>
They also have learned that some things pass very quickly and need to be enjoyed, like kids.
Second time round, as grandparents, you learn to cherish each stage they get to as you are much less preoccupied with the business of earning, career building etc than you were the first time.
Especially so in our case as we lived far from our parents when the children were growing up & trips to grandparents were, therefore, infrequent and longer, whereas we are now 10 minutes away from 1st grandchild & enjoy every possible interaction.
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First sign of age I really noticed was the grey hair falling into my lap when the barber did his stuff. At least I've kept it into my 60's ( on my head, not in a bag!).
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The ' who is that old guy over there' when glancing in a mirror in 'commercial' premises certainly applies!
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>> The ' who is that old guy over there' when glancing in a mirror in
>> 'commercial' premises certainly applies!
>>
It applies to some extent at any age. One's own reflection always seems dead and wooden.
Other people can see the sparkle and liveliness in your eyes and smile, but that is invisible in a mirror. If you try smiling at yourself it appears as an evil grimace.
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I think there is a car analogy here. If you put an old car in the garage, don't take it out much and only use it now and then, it'll probably start to rot, get covered in dust and eventually fail. But, keep it as your daily driver, working for a living, keep it properly maintained and it'll go on for years.
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Surely this is just another franchise of the "why I put the electric kettle in the dishwasher" thread?
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In my youth, when I worked the farms, I had muscles where muscles shouldn't be! I was strong as an ox, and twice as nasty! I did many reckless things without fear, I was indestructible!
In my middle Age, I started paying the price, and had a couple of minor heart attacks, followed by a major one in 2004 that resulted in a quadruple bypass and Kidney damage, leaving me with continued Angina - this I have tried to take in my stride and continue to lead a normal life.
A fortnight ago *21/3/18) I had a major heart attack, I didn't see the 2hr ride to Carlisle, or the two days following!
I was visited by two consultants when I eventually came to senses, one who explained what had happened, told me that I had technically died on them twice(and been resuscitated) and if it should happen again did i want resuscitating again! If it hadn't been for the handful of Aspirin I had swallowed when I realised it wasn't just angina, that would have been it - they bought me the 2hrs to get to hospital.
The other Consultant, in the nicest possible way, asked me if they failed , had I considered Organ Donation! - talk about making a point stick!
I am home again now, but on 3x week dialysis and once again trying to lead a normal life, i'ts still slow going, but at least i'ts going. One thing tho, I'ts definitely kicked me into the Old age stage of life, I've gone from Arnie to Monty Burns in 61 short years!
For me, this time, I'ts not the end!
p.s
I think the NHS DESERVE EVERY SINGLE PENNY THEY CAN GET THEIR HANDS ON! - To all involved in my care - Thankyou!
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I guess there is life in the old dog yet Devonite.
AT 63 I feel pretty good physically, ok a few more aches and pains, and the teeth are giving up the ghost, but as far as cardio vascular fitness goes I am as good as I was at 40 - mind I was smoking then. I am still as childish and reckless as I was 40 year ago, still drive like a loon at times, will climb trees, drink too much and I still feel like that 23 year old.
And then, Butch Wilkins and Bristow pop their cloggs, and suddenly people of my era and slightly younger than me dying make you feel pretty vulnerable.
Buck it, carry on as is I say.
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I shall be 60 this year. I've been mountain biking since before it was called that. Started in my teens with home modified bikes. We fitted chunkier tyres, better brakes, extra gears, straight bars and got ourselves up into the hills and on to the forest tracks. In fact we used to refer to them as "tracker" bikes. You couldn't buy them and had to build your own.
Now of course, a whole industry has grown up around the sport and the very best of equipment is available.
It's been a lifelong hobby and I still do it regularly. I've always been pretty good at getting up a hill I guess, and to this day I can still climb as quick as most, even some of those who are half my age. I still throw myself down mountains on my bikes, getting big air when I can, but I do have to admit that it hurts quite a lot more these days when it doesn't go totally to plan !
What is fun though ( I'm ever so slightly embarrassed to admit ) is if you find yourself climbing in a group and wearing full gear, including a full face race helmet, is that no one can tell what you look like. I get a very self satisfied kick out of taking my helmet off at the top of a long steep climb to reveal this rather lived in face !
I suppose one day it'll all seem like too much effort, but for now I shall continue to ignore the numerical evidence on my birth certificate until it does.
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I'm a realist and often quote the saying that life is: Birth, marriage, kids and death (the latter is the truly unknown element!!)
I certainly don't feel my age, even though people look at me somewhat surprised when I say I'm expecting a telegram from the Queen in "just over two years' time" (that is if she lives long enough!!!)
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I shall be 69 in a couple of weeks.
Both my father and sister died at 64 so I take every day alive as a bonus .I do suffer from high blood pressure but tablets keep it under control.
I had a health scare last year when I thought I was having a heart attack and ended up in A&E ( it was severe indigestion ) which made me lose a couple of stone .I feel so much better now though still over what I should be .
One of my great pleasures is fine dining and wine but now I take care to take it easy on the spicy and fatty foods and drink less.
Last edited by: helicopter on Mon 9 Apr 18 at 13:58
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>>lose a couple of stone .I feel so much better now though still over what I should be .
What weight "should" you be? Using the Body/Mass calculation, if (like me) you score 25, you are on the boundary between Normal and Overweight.
Everyone wants to be slim these days but it struck me last night, watching the opening parade in Leni Riefenstahl's film "Olympia" on the 1936 Games, how chunky many of the athletes then looked, men and women. (A fair number appeared to be in early middle age, to boot.) Even Jesse Owen, one of several black entrants who confounded the nonsense of Hitler's claim of Negro inferiority, looked heavier than todays' svelte runners.
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>>l Even Jesse Owen, one of several black entrants who confounded the
>> nonsense of Hitler's claim of Negro inferiority, looked heavier than todays' svelte runners.
Weren't Hitler's claims about intellectual inferiority, rather than sporting prowess?
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I don't know, but he was very put out by black successes in the games. Riefenstahl only shows him applauding white winners.
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>> I get a
>> very self satisfied kick
>>
>
Pride goeth before a fall, to misquote a popular saying. :)
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Oh I do a fair bit of falling too !
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I'm 65 now and have been lucky with my health so far (Touch wood). Though I did wake up one day last week to find blood on the pillow and when I went to the bathroom I spat some more out of my mouth. It scared the life out of me till a good look in my mouth in the mirror with a torch beaming in showed I had bitten a chunk out of my cheek in the night, much to my relief. I have some sharp jagged edges on the old molars which I must see about getting ground down next time I visit the torture specialist who goes under the title of dentist. I'm regularly chomping through my tongue and lip.
I still weigh the same as when I was eighteen, 10 1/2 stone in a 6'1" frame despite eating like a horse, and I smoke about 11 or 12 cigs a day. Cycling is now a summer activity only, but my job means I clock up lots of walking miles so I'd class myself as reasonably fit.
I think humans are like cars. Some come off the assembly line as tea break specials, badly put together with dodgy parts fitted and no matter how often they are serviced or how well they are looked after they will only have a relatively short life. Others come off with everything made and fitted by the book, and provided they are not badly abused they will run for years only minimal servicing. One can only hope that one came out of the womb as a Toyota rather than a Rover.
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I was contemplating this earlier. Drove home from work in the MX5 - rude not to put the roof down. I was that old man I saw (albeit in a British sports car) all those years ago. Still life is good.
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You are the same height and weight as me.
I was about 16 stone before my operation that was 8 years ago.At 68 I feel fine walk every day and swim once a week.Always busy and twice a week I look after the grandchildren.
I still have all my own teeth not as white as they used to be.It is often luck of the draw how long you live.I know how nearly dying feels so every year to me is a bonus.
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>> A fortnight ago *21/3/18) I had a major heart attack, I didn't see the 2hr
>> ride to Carlisle, or the two days following!
All the best for a speedy recovery Devonite :-)
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>> A fortnight ago *21/3/18) I had a major heart attack, I didn't see the 2hr
I am so sorry that I missed this part of your message.
Good luck, get well, and I hope your recovery is as complete as possible.
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I somehow missed Devonite's post and when you're then reading the latest you don't read all the old ones again.
Sorry! I hope you make a good recovery. As good as possible at least. And you're still so young to be going through this.
I wonder how Pat's father in law is doing... but that's in another thread.
Last edited by: rtj70 on Wed 11 Apr 18 at 22:33
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Yes, I missed it too Devonite but good to hear you are recovering.
Regarding old age, I would just like my body to feel the same age as my head feels, is that too much to ask?:)
Pat
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>> I would just like my body to feel the same age as my head feels, is that too much to ask?:)
....that's easy - just drink a couple of bottles of wine.......and in the morning - sorted!
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"A fortnight ago *21/3/18) I had a major heart attack.........."
All the best for your recovery, devonite; I agree with your sentiments re the NHS.
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Devonite...I’ve just seen your post. Hope you are progressing satisfactorily....take it easy and continue improving
Best wishes. LL
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Thanks for all the "best Wishes" folks, it came out of the blue! - but hopefully i'm on the mend again, breathing hard (same symptoms as Manatee mentioned in the other thread) but as long as i take it easier, and can get past the next 6 months, you will have to put up with me a while longer yet!
Thanks and all the best to you all.
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There seem to be a lot of us here about the same age!
I'm 65 in just under 4 weeks time. Until I got to 40 I didn't really think about keeping fit, exercise etc. When I took voluntary redundancy in 1993 at 40, I decided to start going to the gym to fill in some time between job hunting, and I kept it up until 2009, when we moved to Austria. The stress of the move etc. and the work involved in resettling meant that I had a year or so break, but I joined a gym here and went at least once a week for 2-3 years. I lost the urge then because we were pretty busy with our holiday apartment. I started again in 2013, but my mother had a severe stroke that year, and I kind of lost the enthusiasm for some reason.
We've done a bit of cross-country skiing in our time here, but my real preference is for walking in the summer. I don't feel any different to when I was younger, and SWMBO and I can still manage a 16km walk with a 500m height differential, so compared to most folks in the UK I think we're doing OK in terms of fitness. My BMI is 25, so on the borderline.
One son who turned 30 this year, slim and healthy, feels he's not as fit as he'd like to be and admits he needs to build up his muscles and strength. I forgot to tell him that I didn't start on that route until I was 40 :-)
Not up for taking risks now, still plenty to keep going for. Our only grandchild was 2 a few days ago, so I'm aiming to keep going long enough to see her grown up. Our family seem to be pretty sturdy and long lived!
So definitely in middle age by Cliff's definition.
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>> So definitely in middle age by Cliff's definition.
>>
No one has picked up the other side of my opening paragraph,
"and how much the age you feel is a cause rather than a result of one's physical health."
If through admitedly unlikely circumstances you woke up genuinely believing you were say 55 rather than 65, and mysteriously all your documents and circumstances etc all supported that belief, would you pick up the physical health of the younger you?
There have been instances of people with complicated origins - refugees, death of parents, brought up by other family members, loss of country's records, usual pattern of progressive childhood and birthdays disrupted, etc, so that some quite famous people have ended up having real doubt about their date of birth. Often this has led to them assuming the yougest of the range of possible ages rather than the oldest.
Does that make them actually seem younger, essentially actually "be" younger?
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To an extent the answer must be less. We all know people who seem younger than they actually are . There are also people who seem to act old although they are only in their sixties
Personally I think one of the secrets is not to solely associate with people of you own age. I hate going into a cafe, pub or hotel where everyone is old. I like some children about or to chat with students.
The most depressing thing in the world is surely a group of old people discussing their medications!
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>>>Personally I think one of the secrets is not to solely associate with people of you own age. I hate going into a cafe, pub or hotel where everyone is old. I like some children about or to chat with students.
For us this has become a real factor.... but you do have to be aware of not deluding yourself (by yourself I mean ourselves too) you're "down with the kids" when you're just another oldie trying to stay young!
We notice it most at music gigs we attend as often as possible. We have an invite to one this weekend with an excellent band who play 50s/60s/70s covers but from the last time we saw them we know the audience in the large coffee shop type venue will look more like a retirement home outing... Zimmer frames thrown to one side for a chance of one last (creaky) dance type of thing!
At more major artist gigs of 60s/70s music we find similar with the audience... and often the band too.
In fact last night we were booked to see a major "oldies" rock act but reflecting on the last couple of experiences just 4hrs from the gig re-sold our tickets then went online and booked to see a far lesser know band of twentysomethings soon that we know will be far more vibrant with a mixed audience from teens to 40s where we can enjoy being the token oldies staring at the merch stand loudly proclaiming "LPs weren't that much in our day".
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We went to see Smokie a few weeks ago (Alice who the **** is Alice) - brilliant band - the demographic was older than us - made me feel quite young it did !
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I'm rapidly approaching my mid-40s now (born in 67) and some punk offered me a seat on the DLR the other day.
Cheeky git.
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>> I'm rapidly approaching my mid-40s now (born in 67) and some punk offered me a
>> seat on the DLR the other day.
>>
>> Cheeky git.
>>
That happened to me on the pier railway at Southend a couple of years ago. I was happily standing when a young Chinese girl got up and insisted I take her seat, despite my protestations that I was ok.
Very considerate of her, but it did make me realise I was getting older.
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A couple of months ago, after a pleasant lunch with a former colleague, I jumped on the Trans-Pennine at Huddersfield. In spite of using a walking stick and being unsteady, I had to stand, rammed in the entrance vestibule with 20 other people, all the way back to Manchester.
Last month's trip was better...there were two seats. I don't think there were many students travelling.
Nah, sorry....I didn't 'jump on ', I hauled myself on with the handrails.
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You should have claimed your priority seat Ted. I can see why even that might have been difficult.
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Not the end - Manatee
