Just read this - The Mail uses the P word - which has no bearing at all on the report penned by Will Self. All the story does really is confirm whether a self obsessed hack should be allowed out of London.
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2396222/Stopped-police-branded-paedophile--hiking-son-WILL-SELF-reveals-moment-innocent-ramble-nightmarish-tale-modern-Britain.html
Last edited by: R.P. on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 12:53
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Obviously short of several column feet. It's August.
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Normally I would think how outrageous it was but in this case I will make an exception because it is Will Self and anyone that miserable deserves a world that reflects his misery back to him. Ha ha.
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I think it's called asking for it.
I've only ever seen him on question time and he comes across as a grade 1 prat.
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Amusing when 'utopia' they laud bites its heroes in the back side.
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Why did it take the police half an hour? Seems an unreasonable delay to me. The police must have known after two minutes that they weren't dealing with an abduction.
Unless of course Self took all the time up be outraged.
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I have seen Will Self a few times on Question Time.Common sense bloke in my opinion with no hairs and graces.What was all the fuss about at Burton College to let him walk through with his son?
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How many times do you think "Don't you know who I am?" was said?
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Exactly......outside North London nobody would care, even if they knew. I don't know where the pedophile bit comes in. My guess is that on a hot day an odd bloke with a kid rocks up wanting to take a short cut across private property, the guard tells him no, guard see's a kid wilting in the heat and is rightly concerned enough to report it to the Police. Police take a view and are happy
Last edited by: R.P. on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 14:47
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Or guard gets fed up with "Jumped up little Hitler" style of abuse and decides to get his own back.
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People are within their rights in finding Will Self a bit annoying or taking against his often lugubrious tone. But he isn't a 'jumped up little Hitler' by any stretch of the imagination and I very much doubt that he ever said 'Don't you know who I am?'
I agree the DM piece is a bit overblown, but money's money innit? They ask for a thousand words and you give them a thousand, even if you could say it all better in 600.
- Phil Space
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But he isn't a 'jumped up little Hitler' by any stretch
>> of the imagination
>>
I never said he was, but I'd bet he said that or something similar to the "Jobsworth" as he described them who told him he couldn't do as he pleased.
I've been in the guard's position myself. Middle class Richards are the biggest pain in the butt you come into contact with.
Last edited by: Robin Regal on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 15:59
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>> never said he was, but I'd bet he said that or something similar to the "Jobsworth"
Ah, sorry RR, misread you. Often happens. I doubt that Will Self would have wanted to sound too indignant in front of his nipper... but you never know. He has a ready turn of polemic.
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Do you think what Self wanted to do was unreasonable? I can appreciate the guard is there to do a job of not letting any old Tom/Dick/Harry wander around the grounds, but given that they were in full walking gear with what sounds like a plausible story you'd think he might give them the benefit of the doubt. And Self does allege that the entrance on the other side of the grounds wasn't even guarded, so it sounds like security wasn't a high priority.
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>> Do you think what Self wanted to do was unreasonable?
Unreasonable or not, the rules said no and the answer was no. Its not a public right of way.
You can get all you need to know how the chat with the guard went from the quote:
"I began to remonstrate, saying I was with my own child, and moreover I also teach at a university. But when I saw another guard coming over to back up his beleaguered colleague I thought: life’s too short to argue with jobsworths in high-vis jackets"
Not only "do you know who I am" but also "I am a lecturer"
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>> Not only "do you know who I am" but also "I am a lecturer"
Presumably he used the lecturer bit because it was a college, rather than just trying to sound important.
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>> >> Not only "do you know who I am" but also "I am a lecturer"
>>
>> Presumably he used the lecturer bit because it was a college, rather than just trying
>> to sound important.
He used to because he thought the rules did not apply to him.
I am a computer expert, its ok for me to demand entry into Fujitsu HQ?
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>> >> >> Not only "do you know who I am" but also "I am a lecturer"
>> >>
>> >> Presumably he used the lecturer bit because it was a college, rather than just trying
>> >> to sound important.
>>
>> He used to because he thought the rules did not apply to him.
I disagree.
>> I am a computer expert, its ok for me to demand entry into Fujitsu HQ?
Depends on what you wanted to do (eg. retrieve your ball from the car park) and how you asked (we don't know whether he did 'demand' entry - I doubt that's how it started off). And I was really talking about his motives rather than whether he was right or not.
Used to run half marathons (and won one) that started from the Fujitsu car park in Bracknell - not sure whether it was their HQ though :)
Last edited by: Focusless on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 16:39
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>> >> >> >> Not only "do you know who I am" but also "I am
>> a
>> >> lecturer"
>> >> >>
>> >> >> Presumably he used the lecturer bit because it was a college, rather than
>> just
>> >> trying
>> >> >> to sound important.
>> >>
>> >> He used to because he thought the rules did not apply to him.
>>
>> I disagree.
Ok we will just have to accept that he was perfectly within his rights to demand access across private property, specially because he was a part time lecturer in an establishment some hundreds of miles away, that he was the paragon of politeness and humility, and the police and security guards were all acting far and above their duty and responsibility in a boorish aggressive and accusing way, suggesting he was a raving pedophile intent on doing evil deeds with the pupils.
Last edited by: Zero on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 16:45
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>> Ok we will just have to accept that he was perfectly within his rights to
>> demand access across private property, specially because he was a part time lecturer in an
>> establishment some hundreds of miles away, that he was the paragon of politeness and humility,
>> and the police and security guards were all acting far and above their duty and
>> responsibility in a boorish aggressive and accusing way, suggesting he was a raving pedophile intent
>> on doing evil deeds with the pupils.
You can if you like - I thought we might discuss it, but it appears not!
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>> >> Ok we will just have to accept that he was perfectly within his rights
>> to
>> >> demand access across private property, specially because he was a part time lecturer in
>> an
>> >> establishment some hundreds of miles away, that he was the paragon of politeness and
>> humility,
>> >> and the police and security guards were all acting far and above their duty
>> and
>> >> responsibility in a boorish aggressive and accusing way, suggesting he was a raving pedophile
>> intent
>> >> on doing evil deeds with the pupils.
>>
>> You can if you like - I thought we might discuss it, but it appears
>> not!
Oh I forgot to add that because the College, the land owners, later backed up the guards stance, that they clearly must be at fault as well.
Last edited by: Zero on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 17:00
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>> the College, the land owners, later backed up the guards stance, that they clearly must be at fault as well.
That was indeed one of the contentions of the indignant DM piece by Will Self.
If only the college principals had been English lecturers instead of ghastly illiterate techies ... The whole misunderstanding would have been settled in a moment, with many a courtly bow.
Techies, who needs'em eh?
:o}
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>> Oh I forgot to add that because the College, the land owners, later backed up the
>> guards stance, that they clearly must be at fault as well.
Like I said...
Last edited by: Focusless on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 17:30
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Perhaps they were acting under instruction, but they were still being annoying jobsworths. Enough to wind anyone up, especially some bloke on the telly whose name is known. Perhaps Self told them who he was.
'A clear footpath on the map' across a newish campus is almost certainly the trace of an old public footpath simply appropriated by the college. Walkers often want to follow such paths, and I don't blame them. Rich johnny-come-lately landowners often get up the locals' noses by closing such paths because they don't know or want to know anyone and are attache to their 'privacy', as if a few passers-by were a big threat to that.
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>> Perhaps they were acting under instruction, but they were still being annoying jobsworths. Enough to wind anyone up, especially some bloke on the telly whose name is known. Perhaps Self told them who he was.
>>
>>
Like Jimmy Savile perhaps, as he tried to gain access to a private property with his "niece" in tow?
Minimum wage security guard who can be replaced like a light bulb if he doesn't do his job properly berated by a champagne socialist who's miffed at not getting special treatment.
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>> Do you think what Self wanted to do was unreasonable? I can appreciate the guard
>> is there to do a job of not letting any old Tom/Dick/Harry wander around the
>> grounds,
>>
And the problem the guard might have is if any old Tom, Dick or Harry had an accident on the grounds and decided to sue he'd have to explain why he didn't do his job and keep them out. You can make each individual case sound like an over-zealous application of the rules but so many people want special treatment it's easier to just say no and to make it plain you mean it which can come across as being rude and abrupt, but try and be too nice and you'd be there all day arguing.
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Can you imagine the hoo-hah and the quick P45 if the guard let a couple of unknown people through the campus and a load of money went missing from an office?
The paedophile bit is a total red herring, designed by the author to initiate some pity (what a tit), the guard may well have rung it in for spite...but he may also have thought the 11 year old looked knackered and what on earth were they doing walking miles from anywhere on a main road..so rang it in for welfare issues.
Good on him, if so, for having the gumption to do it, he might have saved some poor kid from his unhinged father.
If he did do it just for spite, he's a tit as well.
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>> If he did do it just for spite, he's a tit as well.
Heavens Westpig, what a relief. For a moment I feared that Hi-Viz solidarity might have kicked in there ...
To give the devil his due, I would expect Will Self to be fully and consciously aware of the absurdity of his position or some aspects of it. But he's a freelance writer with some media exposure, and it goes with the territory - a certain amount of absurdity and theatrical posturing. Fat fees for being a regular big name talking head.
Like someone punting, he won't worry unduly about oiks on the bank thinking he's a tit (I'm not calling you an oik Wp).
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>> Like someone punting, he won't worry unduly about oiks on the bank thinking he's a
>> tit (I'm not calling you an oik Wp).
>>
Oh, don't worry about that. I've been called far worse.
One bloke at Harrow's front counter called me a 'count' once...or I think that's what he said, he did have a bit of an accent..;-)
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Wow you Southerners would be getting the vapours in the town I work. The C word is used with gay abandon. Some enterprising citizen has set up a greeting card business based on its use.
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The C word is used with gay abandon.
Must be twinned with Corby then, every third word it seems.
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There could have been a bit of common sense shown.
I assume the security guards are meant to "patrol" the grounds although 1 would be static at the gate. Why couldn't one of them escort the pair through to the other side as a goodwill gesture.
GCHQ it isn't.
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>> bloke at Harrow's front counter called me a 'count' once... a bit of an accent..
Foreign was he? He may have meant to call you an earl Westpig.
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>> >> Like someone punting, he won't worry unduly about oiks on the bank thinking he's
>> a
>> >> tit (I'm not calling you an oik Wp).
>> >>
>> Oh, don't worry about that. I've been called far worse.
>>
>> One bloke at Harrow's front counter called me a 'count' once...
Arresting a shoplifter were you?
Oh Sorry HarroW
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I know this area well as I've had the dubious pleasure of studying there. It undertakes a lot of FE and HE education as well as teaching farmers how to milk their cows.
The campus is quite open and has more or less unrestricted access to all comers including its residential students. There is however a security hut on the main drive to stop all and sundry driving their cars in. However if you hang a left prior to the hut where the unwashed can park in a huge car park then foot access is unrestricted (south end of campus)
goo.gl/maps/RqwVq
As for the rest of the article. A side note from the college indicates that the two were seen in Cherry Burton between 7.30 and 8pm. They would have been struggling to get to the village of North Dalton before closing time as it's about 10 miles. Average walking speed of an adult is between 3-4mph.
He states his son is 11 years of age and they were undertaking a 30 mile bash. Thats's a long way by anyones standards. For an 11 year old I would imagine that is quite an undertaking. I used to be involved with the Army Cadets (hows about that then guys and gals) 12 - 18 years and 10 to 12 miles was about enough for the younger ages. So I can see that there would be some concern for the welfare of the child.
The Army School of mechanical Transport is not but a stones throw away and many retirees take such jobs as security. One of them would be aware of the physical demands of a 30 mile yomp.
Last edited by: VxFan on Thu 12 Sep 13 at 01:17
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>>hows about that then guys and gals
Lol!!!
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I don't suppose the nipper wanted to be rescued, or for his old man to be embarrassed.
You may not approve of a parent taking his son on a gruelling walk, but he's the parent isn't he? They come in all shapes and sizes. Some are even a bit silly but better a silly parent than none.
Time enough to put the boot into Will Self when his nipper drops dead like someone trying to get into the SAS.
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>>I don't suppose the nipper wanted to be rescued, or for his old man to be embarrassed.
Made me recall an event when speeding the little ones home from Chessington Zoo one evening a few years back.
Doing a little over the posted limit on a clear dual carriageway I was pulled over by a police office who very politely asked if I knew how fast I was going.
Before I could answer, my son, who was about six at the time responded for me...."100 miles an hour!" My daughter who was slightly older creased up on the back seats.
I wasn't doing anything like that but I think it got me off a ticket with a warning and a police officer with a huge grin tried to give be a good telling off but I knew he gave up when he said "Don't do it again" and made a quick exit shaking his head as he went.
Last edited by: zippy on Sun 18 Aug 13 at 23:22
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I like to be with in literature and have been asking myself if I need to read any of Self's books. It seems not.
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Will Self's name is a description of the man...a self important tête de ricard.
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>> asking myself if I need to read any of Self's books. It seems not.
Now there I agree with you.
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If I've read this thread correctly (without clicking the link in the OP), the most disappointing thing is that it appears Will Self is taking the Daily Wail shilling. Boo, Selfie. Thought you had more self respect.
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Daily Wail reporting. - madf
